15 May 2012

Have a Better Marriage Today


It’s never too late to have a better marriage today.  In this time of fast food, instant communications, five minute marriage ceremonies and quickie divorces it’s no wonder people expect and even demand that someone should make their marriage better today. 

No matter that the marriage has been on a downhill slide for months or years and no matter that you haven’t spoken to each other in days, you’re finally seeking help for your marriage and you want results today.

That’s almost like praying to God for patience and you want it now.  Most marriages experience trouble over a period of time, little things become big things and suddenly you realize your marriage is on the rocks and that’s not where you wanted it to be. 

Most couples who get married say they entered into the union forever.  They also realize that marriage is a partnership and you have to work at it to make it successful.  Most also agree that divorce is not the ultimate answer.

This is evident by the fact that the divorce rate is down somewhat even though many are continuing to stay with their spouse even though they’re unhappy and unsatisfied.  More couples seem to be happy than not with three out of four saying they would marry their spouse again.  And, many have by renewing their vows or really marrying them again after divorce.  It’s more common than you might think.

Love is perhaps the key to making your marriage better today and forever even though some husbands and wives declare their love has faded and they’re bored in the relationship.  This is not always the case.  More than half say they love their spouse more now than when first married and that it grows everyday. 

Lifelong enduring love just happens for a chosen few but for the rest of us we have to work at it daily.  Just like we can’t take our spouse for granted, likewise we cannot take each other’s love for granted.  It must be earned.  This is especially true in the early years of marriage after the physical attraction has waned but is also necessary for all marriages for all time. 

Demonstrate your love each day for your spouse.  This can be done with good deeds as you anticipate your spouse’s needs.  But, true marriage saving love must go deeper and be sincere and unfaltering. 

A love that’s forgiving is perhaps the most important.  Few marriages can boast of never needing to forgive one another and each time you experience a forgiving love the more your bond is strengthened.

When couples were asked to list the most important traits in marriage, one of the most mentioned was forgiveness followed by trust and the ability to resolve differences in a peaceful, loving manner. 

Other traits listed were compatibility and spending quality time together. Love may not be a panacea for saving your marriage today but when combined with dedication, it’s certainly a good start.

cheers,
Bobby

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